black lives matter — Elle O'Brien

thoughts from the past two weeks punctuated with quotes and wisdoms from a number of different creators

During my final semester at Colgate I read Ivan Coyote’s Tomboy Survival Guide for a class. Early in the book Ivan notices that people seem to “whisper the important stuff and [say] everything else that [doesn’t] matter loud enough for everyone to hear” (41). Ivan was talking about gossiping pre-teens but it seems to hold true for adult life as well.

It is my hope that the past two weeks have encouraged more of us to say the important things out loud.

That we have said Black Lives Matter.

That we have said their names. George Floyd. Breonna Taylor. Ahmaud Arbery. & so many more.

That we have started to have uncomfortable conversations that are so long overdue.

Silence is simply no longer acceptable. It should have never been acceptable in the first place. We can’t keep whispering the important stuff.

“What does it look like to love someone who lives in a place we’ve never been?”

Jamie Tworkowski

A similar sentiment I have seen shared recently: I understand that I will never understand. However, I stand.

I have spent a lot of time sitting with these quotes and this idea these past two weeks. I am trying to be thoughtful and intentional about the ways in which I show up right now – to stand with empathy and in solidarity with people and a community whose struggles I will never experience.

I think I must go beyond that though. When it comes to race in America, I don’t think it is just about loving people who live somewhere we don’t. It has to be about dismantling the place I live (in whiteness) that was intentionally designed not to love certain people.

I was reminded of a quote by Harriet Lerner recently: “if we would only listen with the same passion we feel about wanting to be heard”

Like many, I have been trying to listen more these past two weeks. To show up but to be careful of the space I take up. I am reading. I am listening to podcasts. I am watching shows and documentaries. I am trying to be thoughtful about what I share online. To my white peers, I hope you too are listening more than you want to be heard right now.

A podcast episode I heard recently reminded me that growth never happens overnight and is rarely accomplished in one decision. Growth is often small. Growth is often slow. It can be quiet.

May we remain committed to a consistent growth from this moment. Even as our social feeds begin returning to “normal”. Even when marches fade. Even when this isn’t a headline. Even then. May we remember that growth happens slowly and in small commitments made each day. The sustained commitment to self-educate. The sustained commitment to supporting Black-owned businesses. The sustained commitment to hold yourself, your family, your elected representatives, your schools, and your friends accountable.

I know that I will continue to make mistakes. We all will. I hope that we no longer accept that as an excuse for silence.

Love is cool. But love without action ain’t shit

Adrian Michael Green

One month ago (roughly) I said on Instagram that moving forward every month we would do a “deep dive” on the blog ala what gets you out of bed in the morning. We will do our first one this month and it will be on race. I am working on a list of polls and questions for that coming soon but my hope is in the end to have a piece that both offers our reflections on this moment and suggests resources (educational, places to donate, petitions to sign).

Until that piece is finished I will leave you with this guide from @lily.someson